Wedding Jokes

75 Funny Wedding Jokes to Keep Your Guests Entertained

If you’re looking to add a little extra fun and humor to your wedding ceremony, then why not use some funny wedding jokes?

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Whether it’s around the cake cutting, during the bouquet toss, or any other moment throughout the night that calls for levity, this collection of 75 funny wedding jokes will set the mood and help keep your guests engaged and entertained.

So grab a glass of bubbly, sit back in anticipation as we get ready to dive into some killer one-liners (and puns!) with our curated list of laughs!

For more humor:
Funny Maid of Honor Speech Lines
Funny Anniversary Wishes for Friends
Funny Marriage Quotes

Jokes for Wedding Speech

60 Funny Marriage Quotes You Will Want In Your Wedding Speech
  • My friend said she wanted to have a fairytale wedding, so I got her a pumpkin carriage. Turns out she just wanted to marry a prince, not ride in a gourd.
  • At weddings, the bride always cries and the groom is always happy. It’s like they both just realized they’re going to have to put up with each other for the rest of their lives.
  • My best man speech was so bad, they asked me to return the ring.
  • My friend asked me to be her wedding DJ. I said yes, but only if I get to play ‘Don’t Stop Believin” at least five times.
  • My wedding day was the happiest day of my life… until the bar tab came in.
  • I’m not saying the wedding was expensive, but I’m pretty sure the cake was made of gold.
  • I once attended a wedding where the groom’s vows were just a list of chores he promised to do around the house. It was the most romantic thing I’ve ever heard.
  • At my friend’s wedding, the officiant asked if anyone objected to the marriage. I raised my hand and said, ‘I object to this being an open bar. Cut me off, please!’
  • I love weddings because they’re the only place where the open bar is more popular than the dance floor.
  • I saw the bride crying during the ceremony, and I thought to myself, ‘Oh no, she’s having second thoughts.’ Then I remembered, it’s just allergies. Phew!
  • The best part about being the wedding host is that I get to eat all the leftover cake. It’s a tough job, but someone’s gotta do it.
  • I always get nervous when the bride and groom write their own vows. It’s like a game of Mad Libs, but with someone else’s heart on the line.
  • I asked the bride how she was feeling before the ceremony, and she said she was a bundle of nerves. I told her not to worry, it’s just like ripping off a Band-Aid. Except instead of a Band-Aid, it’s a wedding dress.
  • At the wedding, the best man gave a toast, saying, ‘I’ve never seen the groom happier than he is now. Except for that one time when he found out avocado toast was back on the menu.’
  • The father of the bride gave a tearful speech, saying, ‘I’m not losing a daughter, I’m gaining a son-in-law. And a few extra gray hairs.’
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Jokes about the Wedding Party

  • You know what they say, marriage is a marathon, not a sprint. Unless you’re at the reception, then it’s definitely a sprint to the open bar.
  • The wedding was outdoors, and it started raining just as the bride and groom exchanged their vows. The groom said, ‘I guess it’s official now, we’re really showering together.’
  • Planning a wedding is like running a marathon, except instead of water stations, you have champagne stations every few feet. It’s all about pacing yourself.
  • The father-daughter dance is always a tear-jerker, but let’s not forget the mother-son dance. It’s like watching a game of “hot potato” with the groom’s mom trying to hand him off to his new wife.
  • The bouquet toss is like a scene from The Hunger Games. May the odds be ever in your favor, ladies.
  • At weddings, the cake is always the star of the show, but let’s be real, the real star of the show is the open bar. It’s like a beacon of hope for those who hate dancing.
  • The wedding vows are like a verbal contract. You promise to love, honor, and cherish each other until death do you part…or until someone forgets to put the toilet seat down.
  • The best man speech is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re going to get. Sometimes it’s sweet, sometimes it’s nutty, and sometimes it leaves a bad taste in your mouth.
  • The first dance is like a dance-off between the bride and groom. The winner gets to decide what’s for dinner for the next 50 years.
  • The wedding favors are like a little piece of the couple’s love that you can take home with you…until you accidentally leave it on the table and someone else takes it.
  • The wedding photos are like a time capsule. In 20 years, you’ll look back and wonder why everyone had matching tuxedos and why you thought it was a good idea to wear a flower crown.
  • The wedding reception is like a giant party with all your friends and family, except this time you have to wear uncomfortable shoes and pretend you like everyone’s dance moves.

Wedding Jokes about Bride and Groom

Hysterical Lines to Make Your Maid of Honor Speech As Funny As Possible 1
  • Why did the bride wear white on her wedding day? So her exes could see her true colors.
  • The bride may be getting cold feet, but her heart is on fire for her groom.
  • Why did the wedding ceremony end early? The couple was too excited to wait any longer to start their happily ever after.
  • The groom’s ring was too tight, so the bride said, ‘Looks like you’re stuck with me now.’
  • The bride is looking so stunning, she could turn a gay man straight… or at least make him question his sexuality.
  • Why did the bride refuse to toss the bouquet? She said she paid too much for it and didn’t want to risk losing it.
  • Why did the groom arrive late to the wedding? He was trying to tie the knot, but couldn’t get the hang of it.
  • I asked the groom how he knew his bride was the one. He said, ‘She laughed at all my jokes.’ I guess that’s what it takes to lock down a man with bad humor.
  • Why do brides wear white on their wedding day? Because it’s the color of surrender.
  • The groom’s vows were so touching, even the cake was in tiers.
  • Why did the wedding guests bring umbrellas? In case the bride and groom had a ‘shower’ of love.
  • Here comes the bride, all dressed in white… and a little bit of sweat, let’s be real.
  • Why did the bride wear white? Because she wanted to blend in with the tablecloths.
See also  The Ultimate Guide To Your Maid Of Honor Speech

Jokes about Love

  • They say love is blind, but I think it’s just short-sighted. It couldn’t see anyone else but you.
  • Love is like a good wine, it gets better with age, but sometimes it gives you a headache the next morning.
  • I heard the couple’s love is like a puzzle, but let’s hope they don’t lose any pieces.
  • Love is like a game of Jenga, it takes skill and patience to keep building, but one wrong move and it all comes crashing down.
  • I heard the couple’s love story is like a fairytale, but hopefully with fewer evil stepmothers.
  • True love is like a meme, it’s viral and spreads quickly, and before you know it, everyone’s talking about it.
  • Looks like love is in the air… and the pollen count is through the roof!
  • I heard the couple’s love is like a rollercoaster, but hopefully with less throwing up.
  • Love is like a song, it’s beautiful and uplifting, and these two have written a masterpiece together.
  • I always thought love was just a fairytale, turns out it was just the Disney themed wedding.

Jokes about Marriage

Funny Quotes About Being Married
  • Marriage is like a game of Tetris. Sometimes you just have to rotate and adjust to make it fit.
  • Marriage is like a deck of cards. You need a heart to play the game, but a diamond is what you really want.
  • I heard the secret to a happy marriage is to always keep the remote control within reach.
  • Marriage is like a rollercoaster, it has its ups and downs, but as long as you hold on tight, it’s the ride of your life.
  • Marriage is like a book, it has its chapter, but as long as you keep turning the pages, the story never ends.
  • Marriage is like a comedy routine, it’s all about timing and delivery, and these two have both nailed it.
  • I always say, a wedding is like a game of Jenga. You start with a solid foundation, but one wrong move and everything can come crashing down. But don’t worry, I’m here to make sure we don’t lose any blocks!
  • I asked my wife why she married me and she said, ‘Because you had a ring and I wanted it’.
  • Marriage is like a box of chocolates – you never know what you’re going to get, but you know it’s going to be sweet.
  • Weddings are a lot like roller coasters. They’re exciting, they make you feel alive, and sometimes you want to throw up.
  • Marriage is like a cooking show, it’s all about experimenting and trying new things, and these two are definitely not afraid to spice things up.
  • Marriage is like a game of cards – sometimes you get a royal flush, sometimes you get a pair of twos.
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Funny Lines for Him or Her

  • I always knew my love for [bride/groom] was real when I realized I couldn’t live without their dad jokes.
  • I never believed in love at first sight until I saw the cake.
  • I think I found the missing piece to my puzzle… and it’s a ring!
  • I’m not saying I’m perfect, but I’m pretty close… to finding my perfect match.
  • My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
  • I wanted to have a ‘shotgun wedding’, but she said no because she’s not into firearms.
  • I never thought I’d find someone who completes me, turns out it was just my other half of the wedding cake.
  • I asked my wife what she wanted for our wedding anniversary. She said, ‘Just surprise me.’ So I showed up with a trumpet and a mariachi band.
  • I told my wife we should renew our vows every 10 years. She asked why we couldn’t just renew our Netflix subscription instead.
  • The bride and groom may be saying ‘I do’ today, but let’s be real, they’ll be saying ‘I don’t’ to a lot of things in the future.
  • I may not be a mathemagician, but I know that two hearts plus one ring equals forever.
  • What do you call a couple who marries in a library? Booked for life.

Final Thoughts

Making your wedding day memorable is all about having fun. With the right kind of humor, your day can be filled with laughter and plenty of light-hearted moments.

The 75 funny wedding jokes provided in this blog post are sure to have your guests rolling in laughter. You can even remix them to make them your own and add some flair to your reception. So why not give these jokes a try? Who knows? They might just be the key ingredient you need to create an unforgettable experience for everyone present at your special event! Best of luck and congratulations on your upcoming nuptials!

Rosie Liliy
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